I Don't Want to Be Loved

Rihannan sighed. She recognized this childish content. It was the song Dimitri used to sing to make fun of her as a kid.

“Who wrote this letter?”

“He’s down there.” the girl pointed to the river bank.

“Did you see his face?”

The girl nodded. “It was someone with shiny hair color like you, sister. He was also tall.”

Dimitri was here.

An overwhelming happiness enveloped Rihannan. She didn’t know why Dimi would seek her out like this, but she didn’t care. Dimitri has always been quite playful, so perhaps he had planned a surprise visit for her birthday.

Rihannan was about to run off to the river bank when she suddenly stopped her steps to look at her guards. Many of them were still busy clearing the path while the rest of them were keeping an eye out in case any suspicious person approached.

Dimi did not officially announce his visit to Arundel, so nothing good would come out of telling everybody that he was here. What’s more, Dimi came to her in the stealthiest possible way, so It would be better if she listened to what he had to say in private.

“Children.”

The kids who were busy packing the food looked at her. Rihannan smiled.

“Could you lend me a hand?”

***

The swords clashed with a loud sound. It’s been too long since they sparred, but neither side wanted to surrender. Basil could hardly fend off Igor’s attacks.

For some reason, his stance showed signs of lack of refinement. Unlike the elegant style that was popularly taught to nobles, Igor’s fencing style was more savage. It was a style mostly used by soldiers who had spent years in the battlefield.

“Did you go out of the Palace without telling me? Where did you learn to fight like this?”

As he finished saying this words, Igor’s sharp sword barely missed his head, making Basil shut up immediately. If he kept babbling, he would truly die.

It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that Basil had spent all these years glued to Igor. Whatever he did, Basil was always by his side, so much so that Basil knew more of Igor than he did of his own wife.

That’s why he couldn’t help but feel surprised whenever Igor acted in a way he had never seen before.

These type of situations were more notorious lately. After Igor threatened Viscount Olbach and his wife, Basil was genuinely wondering whether a fox had disguised itself with Igor’s skin. He thought that the Igor he knew would never be able to do such thing.

Clang!

In that moment, as Basil was distracted in his own thoughts, Igor took his chance and hit Basil’s hand with his sword grip. Basil’s sword fell to the floor, among the autumn leaves.

Basil rubbed his hand, smiling bitterly.

“Do you feel invigorating after beating me up as much as you wanted?”

Igor had been extremely nervous ever since Rihannan left the Palace. He couldn’t concentrate in anything at all, as though he was obsessed with something he couldn’t understand. Basil had told him that the best thing he could do was to exercise his body while leaving his mind blank, which was why he brought Igor for a sparring session.

He didn’t think Igor would hit him like this, though.

Igor grabbed a handkerchief and wiped the sweat from his forehead. He let himself fall to the ground and Basil silently sat by his side. Then, Igor, who had remained silent all this time, finally spoke.

“No news from the mercenary yet?”

Basil let out a long sigh.Even after all these exercise, Igor’s worries were still plaguing his mind.

“No, Your Majesty. For some strange reason, Count Clovis keeps his mouth shut tight when it comes to anything related to that mercenary. But we’ll find out soon, don’t worry. Please, wait patiently for a little longer.”

Up till now, Count Clovis was quick to provide any information or secrets that were required from him, and was willing to help in anything he could. However, he would not say anything regarding that assassin. Since their only link to that man was the Count, who remained silent, the investigation was brought to a halt.

This made Igor burst in anger. The King finally ordered his guards to kill the Count unless he cooperated. Even if this threat was half-hearted, it should be enough to scare anyone.

The order must have already been delivered to the Count’s cell, so all they had to do was wait for him to talk.

“The reason why the Count remains silent must be because, if he does talk, he’ll be in even greater trouble.”

Igor thought of that. He knew the Count would end up revealing anything he knew, but he was wondering what was the delay. The Count wasn’t behaving like he’d expected.

Actually, Igor kept having this nagging feeling which made him think he had done some grave mistake.

“Now I’m not sure whether sending Rihannan to the Villa was the right choice…”

Looking at his darkening expression, Basil shrewdly said “Then, why don’t you follow her? You can make up with the Queen Mother while you are there, as well.”

“You still think I can make up with my mother, uh?”

“What’s stopping you? It’s not like the Queen Mother is trying to steal your position. Anyways, that’s impossible now. Please, show her some mercy. When she dies, it will be too late to feel remorse.”

“Remorse…” Igor whispered angrily. “Basil, if all my mother had taken from me was power, I wouldn’t hate her as much as I do now.”

“What else did she do for you to hate her like this?”

“She shifted all the anger and hatred towards me. In the end, that woman escaped from all the criticism and blame that should have been directed against her. She wanted people to think of her as a good person till the end, regardless of what she had to do to achieve this.”

Ironically, the Queen Mother really liked Rihannan. That’s why she didn’t tell Igor to get rid of her once she knew she was unable to have children, but instead, she’d urged him to find an alternative womb to conceive his heir. It was an unexpected suggestion, especially considering how the Queen Mother usually delt with problems. It would have been easier for her to get rid of Rihannan and place another woman in her position.

Even when the Queen Mother was the one who created a crack between them, in contradiction to her actions, she had truly wished for Rihannan to give birth to a baby so they could be a happy family.

The Queen Mother knew that the only person who had genuinely treated her with kindness was Rihannan. She was happy about this, but it didn’t stop her from taking advantage of the situation.

“Basil, there’s something I need to confess to you.”

“…”

For a moment, Basil had a strange thought cross his mind, which made him shudder and step away from Igor.

Igor could barely hold back his desire to hit Basil. Looking at his reaction, he must have surely thought something stupid.

“I once heard a conversation between my mother and Marquis Rozan.”

“What sort of conversation?”

“They talked about how she could lose all her power if I suddenly died, which is why they were hoping for me to have an heir soon to continue the lineage, in case anything happened to me.”

Basil’s jaw went slack for a moment. This was a shocking revelation to him.

“When did this exchange happen?”

“When I was eight… it was after I was gravely injured. The Queen Mother realized just then the fragility of her power.”

“Is that why you’ve hated the Queen Mother ever since?”

“Basil, if it were you, what would surprise you more, your wife’s betrayal, or the backstabbing of someone you had no relationship with?”

Basil shuddered. He didn’t want to imagine such a scene.

“…I’d be more surprised if my wife betrayed me. I would not be able to handle it.”

“Of course. That would be normal.”

After chasing Rihannan all the way to the Port of Salerno and not being able to reach her before she left, Igor came back to the Palace. There, he found out that Rihannan had sent the Queen Mother a letter filled with words of kindness and consideration. No one would think that such a letter was written by someone who had just gone through a painful, miserable death.

Rihannan hated herself. However, she still loved and treasured the Queen Mother, who had been cruel to her, to the point of personally writing her a letter just before leaving everything behind to go to Chrichton.

Before parting, it seemed like her only happy memories where those she’d had with his mother. How would she react if she found out that his mother, the one she loved so dearly, was the culprit behind such heinous crimes?

It was at that point that Igor considered that, even if Rihannan found out that he, too, could remember their past life, he’d never reveal the truth about his mother to her.

“I don’t want Rihannan to feel the same way as I do. There’s no need to make her feel more hatred.”

Basil looked at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Your Majesty!”

Suddenly, the urgent voice of Mrs. Cessly resonated in the room. She was frantically running towards Igor and Basil, without worrying about appearances.

The two man immediately stood up. “Mrs. Cessly, what’s the p-?”

“Please, look at this!”

Mrs. Cessly was struggling to catch her breath. She quickly gave the King a crumpled letter.

“What is this?”

“Please… read it quickly, Your Majesty! it’s a letter from Princess Helena!”

Igor focused his gaze on the letter, quickly unfolded it and read through its contents.

To my beloved Ria,

My elder brother is planning to kill you. I think he is doing it to get revenge on Baron Dimitri. He has dug out all he could about you, and he’s planning on using this information to lure you out.

I’m sorry. I found out about his plans too late…

He is planning on luring you out of the Queen’s Palace to… assassinate you.

Please, be careful.

I hope I’m not too late.

Your friend,

Helena.